Clear Eyes, Warm Hearts, Can't Lose

It's been a really good week but a a busy one so TGIF! I'm normally fairly reclusive on week nights - not this week. Between work dinners, social dinners and a little down time, I've found my way back to a happy and more positive space.

I met up with my ex-boss from the "armpit of Africa" office who was such an encouragement to me, making me see that good in various work situations and giving me a far more positive outlook on my 8 to 5 life. He really has become a great mentor to me and I'm truely greatful for this input at the moment.

Then, I put my cooking skills to the test and had 3 of my ladies over for our first "pasta and prayer" night. I promise that my cooking on the night was closely monitored by my man who called me to check on the progress and give some helpful hints before they arrived. Food aside, what an awesome night of connecting with the girls and sharing our lives. Nowadays so many of our new friendships are lived in a very superficial space and never really make it into the stage or depth that some of our longer standing friendships do. It was awesome to be honest and real and share the truths of our lifes making all of us feel more normal and less alone!

This week I also discovered podcasts on my iPad (I'm hugely technicologically challenged you see so it did take me a while) and I've been loving listening to hugely motiviating stories, money matters etc. It's my new favourite thing and I can't wait for my data bundle to kick in tomorrow morning so that I can download some more!

In what must be one of my favourite series ever, Friday Night Lights, Coach Taylor's famous saying is "clear eyes, warm hearts, can't lose." I feel like this week, I've without knowing it, been able to live with clear eyes and a warm heart. Clear eyes because I've been able to put into perspective all that has been going on, seperating the person from the problem (as Arnold Mol teaches) and as a result, being a little less stressed out. Seeing that I'm not alone in my worries or my fears has also helped me in seeing that I'm not paranoid in this and that a burden shared is a burden halved. Warm hearts because I've been able to remember elements of my role that I used to love and have tried to seek out more of these things to incorporate into my work and personal life (prehaps some further studies lie ahead in my future!) Knowing what I'm passionate about has helped me to feel that there is more to my current work life and hopefully I'm able to make positive steps forward in achieiving this.

So over all, it's been a great week. But man oh man am I glad it's Friday - excitement like Dillon supporters felt as the lights came on and the Panthers were about to run out onto the field! Happy Friday :-)

The Exchange

What do you mean I can't buy any of the clothes in your store? A question I'm sure that many have asked when visiting one of Cavindish's newest stores, The Exchange. As the world's first cashless boutique, all they ask is that you sign up to become and Organ Donor and you can leave with a garment or accessory from one of SA's top 25 designers.

Unfortunately for those of us who have already signed up, we'll leave the store empty handed, but what an amazing way to encourage more people to save lives. To find out more visit: The Exchange

Think Happy Thoughts

It's a slippery slide, our mind. Get into a sticky situation in one area of your life, unable to see the positive in the situation and all of a sudden the whole world sucks! I realised a little while ago that I was letting small things that weren't ideal, granted, dictate my outlook on many other things and ultimately this was distroying my "thought life." As my brother has told me many times, I will FIND something to stress about. I've found myself becoming increasingly negative in my mind and this has now flowed over into my words. I definitely don't want to be that person who never has anything nice to say!

And so, in thinking about how to rectify this solution, I've come up with the following "how to think happy thoughts" guide:

 - WWGD (What Would Gran Do) - My gran is without a doubt the most insanely positive person that I know, and probably ever will know. She's almost positive to a fault. When ever that nagging negative pops up I'm going to thing WWGD!

- Be Grateful - Early on in my blog life, I wrote about all the things that I'm grateful for in my life. Prehaps rereading and recapping on this would be a good idea every once in a while ;-)

- Put it all in context - every day I drive past a beggar, a homeless person, someone with way bigger and more pressing issues on their mind. Take a chill pill. Have a glass of wine. Build a bridge. Get over it!

- Stop the repetition - if you've thought about it once, move on! Stop the endlessly repetative loop that one senario or thought get's airtime for in your mind
- Have a "looking forward to" list - ever since my homesick days at boarding school I've always made little lists in my mind of things to look forward to in that day or that week. It can be the smallest thing ever (like going home to watch your favourite show) but it really helps to have something, ANYTHING, to look forward to when you're down.

So here's to keeping calm and thinking happy thoughts from now on!

It's "air the dirty laundry" time again

It's that time of year again. Performance management year end review time. Bleh. It's never before been my favourite time but it's also never been something that I've TOTALLY not looked forward too. But then again, I've never had to give feedback to anyone before, let alone a full team. Nor, clearly, have I ever had such a tumultious year. There is a first time for everything it seems.

Not only do I not feel like rehashing all the long gone, but not forgotten "bosperaad" dialogue, I"m just not sure that I have enough emotional strength or energy to go through it all again. Some things truely are better left unsaid. Unheard. Unwritten. Unread.

But...this is the corporate worold after all and so let's all get down to it and air the dirty laundry. I'm ordering a healthy dose of Stay Soft to dish out at all the many upcoming conversations giving and receiving that wonderful "constructive" criticism everyone always talks about. Apparently it's great for personal growth (or self esteem deminishment.) And again I say Bleh. BLEH...

Heartfelt Stories

A little while I blogged about the awesome Heartfelt evening I'd been to. Rather than tell their stories for them, read the 4 amazing women's stories here.

The Bilbo Baggins in me...

I'm such a creature of habit and route and tend to dislike massive changes, and yet, I crave adventure and out of the box experiences. The thought of packing up all that I know and love and moving to some remote African country (before I sound misinformed about my own continent...outside of SOUTH Africa) both horrifies me and excites me beyond belief!

I've always thought that once you've found your "partner in crime" it would be far easier to leave the life that you know and embark on a massive adventure. More recently I've started to think what better way to raise a child - open to new places and people, new ideas and experiences.

All these thoughts have been running around my ever-over-active mind for the past few days. It's that "there must be more to life than this" moment that currently haunts me. Seeing people who I work with who have been not only with the same organisation, but in the same role, for 20 years quite frankly scares the living daylights out of me and I've only been here a little over 6 years...Moving from the sleepy hollow that I used to live in to the slightly less tiny nearby town was a big move. The move from there to my now much loved adopted Mother City an even bigger jump (which despite all the anxiety and stress around the move, has without a doubt been the best thing that has EVER happened to me) and so the thought of ever leaving is both sad but comforting to know that it can be done happily.

Nothing is on the cards in the near (or even distant future) but it's definitely an adventure that I'd be open to taking if and when it ever comes up. Prehaps, like Bilbo, I'll make my way home oneday after a story book adventure safe in the knowledge that places have been seen, people have been met and experiences had that would never have been possibly imagined had we not left the home!

Who do You say I am?

Last night I attended Heartfelt with a friend, an evening for ladies at my church, Common Ground and the topic couldn't have come at a better time for me. The theme of the evening was "Who do You say I am?" and the four ladies who shared their amazing stories explored who it is that we listen to when it comes to how we form opinions of ourselves.

One of the ladies did the most hillarious skit portraying all of the comments from those around us descrining us that we save and replay over and over on the "casette tape" in our minds. Things like: she snacks alot, she's a drama queen, she is not at all sporty, she looks like a rugby prop, she is highly emotional... How do we go about defining who WE are (and who HE says we are) when playing these recordings over and over in our minds.

They played the "Dove - Real Beauty" clip, which I'd successfully avoided watching after hundreds of my facebook friends had shared it! It shows just how we as women aren't able to give a clear description of how we look and how tainted our opinions of ourselves are by the views of others.

It was a time to reflect and look back over the past few months and to try to erase some of the horrible things which have been said, have been heard, have been written. To take back control of the "tape in my head." To take back control of the image that I have of me and to not give a damn of any image that overs may have as a result of hearsay. To take back control of the image I portray and to ensure that it's reflective of who HE says I am.

There are limited spaces left for the last Heartfelt session taking place on Saturday - Cape Town ladies, click here if you are keen to attend this amazing event.

Fishing, Skiing, Eating and all those good things

This weekend we took a drive to a friends house on the Breede River for an amazingly relaxing weekend away. We were celebrating his 31st birthday and celebrate we did with great food (the potjie and the baked cheesecake blew my mind), good wine (but not too much of it), awesome company (almost all from the EC #winkwink) and some pretty horrid fishing (we caught "sweet-f-all!")

It was so great to do a little "road-less-travelled" adventuring and visit Infanta - a place I've never been to before and am fairly certain I'll never visit again! It has the biggest river mouth that I've ever seen and the amount of water pushing through totally explains why the water ends up way inland at Riviersonderend.

The weather was amazing - far too warm for all the winter woolies that I'd packed remembering our last icy cold trip there. The river looked like glass for our whole weekend with not a ripple, other than from the crazy folk who dared to ski (one even without a wetsuit!) We even got to see the oldest hand-pulled pont in South Africa in action.

Great break away with some great people - Thank You guys :-)

Happy Friday!

It's a HaPpY fRiDaY because:

1) The sun is shining
2) I'm about to leave work
3) We're about to go away for the weekend
4) We're going away with most of my nearest and dearest besties
5) There will be wine where we are going!
6) There will be water where we are going
7) There will no doubt be good food where we are going (with 2 chefs and an exceptional home cook in tow)
8) My boo will be with me
9) There will hopefully be no cell phone reception where we are going
10) Every day is a happy day when it is has been a stress free day at work :-)

Happy Friday everyone!

Four & Twenty Blackbirds baked in a pie

I love that I live in an area which offers most of lifes essentials within walking distance from my house - hair dresser, pub and grub, great Thai Resturant and take aways, a grocery store and of course a bottle store. The one think that I've always wished for in the 'hood was a great coffee spot and if I really wanted to be fussy, a bistro or patisserie to boot.

Four and Twenty (or Four and Twenty Blackbirds as I like to call it, in an effort to remember the new name) has recently opened in the ever popular Chelsea Village area. They offer all things I'd been wishing for: great coffee, great atmosphere, great background music, amazing pastries and menu, along with some pantry staples.

We popped in for coffee and a croissant in their first week of business and the vibe has already been well established with many locals popping in to see the new kid on the block. Check out more on Four and Twenty on their website or Facebook page. 

Good luck to the ladies and I'll see you again soon!

It's all about the Compromise!

This weekend we went on a 3 hour hike with friends and while I by no means consider myself fit or athletic, I love being outdoors and being in big wide open spaces. Outings like these make the farm girl in me really happy and content and my man knows this. Is it his favorite thing in the world? Definitely not but he does it anyway - maybe because he knows it's important to me or that it makes me happy...

This got me thinking and I wasn't sure that I do enough to return the favour. The closest I've come in the last little while is watching Iron Man 3 with him! I'm not the biggest fan of action flicks but I sat through the thing 'cause he was super excited about seeing it.

It's easy to compromise when it comes to little things like hikes and taste in movies (or lack thereof #winkwink!) but I've realised that there are things more serious than these that I'm extremely greatful that neither of us need to compromise on. So often I speak to friends who are reluctantly compromising on some fairly fundamental beliefs or valuest that they have all in the name of keeping the peace or keeping the relationship going. Who is to judge in these types of situations? Not me! But I am incredibly greatful that on any given weekend the compromising questions on the table are: Chicken or Sushi; Hiking or TV; Action or Period Drama?!

Keep Calm and Explore

Exploring new places has always been one of my favourite things to do. So often we think that we need to go beyond our borders to discover a favourite new place, when so often we're living within a 2 hours radius of the most interesting destinations.


St Helena Bay - Fishing Boat



My boo and I will often just go for a drive "to no where" and see where the road takes us. This past weekend we did just that and headed up the West Coast. Both not being from the Western Cape, there are many spots in this direction that we've not yet been to but rather than hit the more touristy places, we tried to find the "off the beaten track" places.

Our first discovery definitely fit that brief. St Helena Bay must be one of the more random places I've visited in my life! With many fishing industry related businesses there, the coastline is not particularly "untouched" but that in itself gives it it's own charm. It's clear to see that the community revolves around the income that the industry brings in although they are clearly trying to increase the tourism industry with plenty of estates with nice roads and street lights, but not too many houses build yet.

Vasco de Gama Monument


St Helena Bay is also the place that Vasco de Gama first set foot in South Africa in 1497. We visited the monument erected to commemorate this only to find plenty of smashed beer bottles on the ground - either it's a popular drinking spot, or the locals don't think much of old Mr de Gama!

After a little drive around there we headed back in the direction of home and stopped off for some "slap" chips in Paternoster. Not entirely non-touristy, Paternoster is just a place that neither of us had been to yet. It's quainty white washed fisherman cottages reminded me a bit of how I imagine Greece to look. It's would definitely be the prefered weekend destination choice for me over it's neighbour St Helena!

Last up was Saldanha Bay, which at my request, we just drove through and didn't stop in. I was too afraid of getting attacked by the millions of sea gulls swirling overhead as a result of the many fishing boats that had just brought in their hauls. That and the fact that the Steel Factory there made everything an unhealthy red colour which had me a little concerned! Let's just say that I'm very glad that my life has taken the path that it has and that this is not a place that I call home!